It's Hard to Love a Reptile
from Paws Claws Scales & Tales by Monty Harper
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lyrics
The day when we learned the aquarium burned
My sister went there to inquire,
Could she answer the need to help shelter and feed
A few creatures they'd saved from the fire.
Dad was happy to take in a fish or a snake
Knowing homes would be found for them later.
But none of us thought she'd bring home what she brought -
A three hundred pound alligator!
It's hard to love a reptile
When you know that she don't love you back;
When your gazes connect and you start to suspect
She's been thinking of you - as a snack!
And you can't cuddle up much cause being in her clutch
You'd fear she may tear you apart.
It's so hard to love a reptile
With dry scaly skin, a wide toothy grin,
And a three-chambered, cold-blooded heart!
They'd named her Lucinda cause she was luesistic,
Which colored her skin ghostly white.
And the scales on her tail rubbed the sides of the bathtub
Which kept me awake late at night.
I glimpsed my demise in her steely teal eyes
When she'd turn 'em to stare my direction.
"Don't you worry," said Sis. "There is nothing amiss.
She's just hungry for your sweet affection!"
It's hard to love a reptile
When you know that she don't love you back;
When your gazes connect and you start to suspect
She's been thinking of you - as a snack!
And you can't cuddle up much cause being in her clutch
You'd fear she may tear you apart.
It's so hard to love a reptile
With dry scaly skin, a wide toothy grin,
And a three-chambered, cold-blooded heart!
She ate like the dickens and swallowed whole chickens
Without ever needing to chew.
I was mighty relieved by the call we received
When they'd found her a home at the zoo.
As I said to Lucinda, "Goodbye greedy friend,"
A new feeling crept up from down deeper.
I surprised even me when a tear trickled free
And I blubbered out, "Why can't we keep her?"
It's hard to love a reptile
When you know that she don't love you back;
When your gazes connect and you start to suspect
She's been thinking of you - as a snack!
And you can't cuddle up much cause being in her clutch
You'd fear she may tear you apart.
It's so hard to love a reptile
With dry scaly skin, a wide toothy grin,
And a three-chambered, cold-blooded heart!
My sister went there to inquire,
Could she answer the need to help shelter and feed
A few creatures they'd saved from the fire.
Dad was happy to take in a fish or a snake
Knowing homes would be found for them later.
But none of us thought she'd bring home what she brought -
A three hundred pound alligator!
It's hard to love a reptile
When you know that she don't love you back;
When your gazes connect and you start to suspect
She's been thinking of you - as a snack!
And you can't cuddle up much cause being in her clutch
You'd fear she may tear you apart.
It's so hard to love a reptile
With dry scaly skin, a wide toothy grin,
And a three-chambered, cold-blooded heart!
They'd named her Lucinda cause she was luesistic,
Which colored her skin ghostly white.
And the scales on her tail rubbed the sides of the bathtub
Which kept me awake late at night.
I glimpsed my demise in her steely teal eyes
When she'd turn 'em to stare my direction.
"Don't you worry," said Sis. "There is nothing amiss.
She's just hungry for your sweet affection!"
It's hard to love a reptile
When you know that she don't love you back;
When your gazes connect and you start to suspect
She's been thinking of you - as a snack!
And you can't cuddle up much cause being in her clutch
You'd fear she may tear you apart.
It's so hard to love a reptile
With dry scaly skin, a wide toothy grin,
And a three-chambered, cold-blooded heart!
She ate like the dickens and swallowed whole chickens
Without ever needing to chew.
I was mighty relieved by the call we received
When they'd found her a home at the zoo.
As I said to Lucinda, "Goodbye greedy friend,"
A new feeling crept up from down deeper.
I surprised even me when a tear trickled free
And I blubbered out, "Why can't we keep her?"
It's hard to love a reptile
When you know that she don't love you back;
When your gazes connect and you start to suspect
She's been thinking of you - as a snack!
And you can't cuddle up much cause being in her clutch
You'd fear she may tear you apart.
It's so hard to love a reptile
With dry scaly skin, a wide toothy grin,
And a three-chambered, cold-blooded heart!
credits
from Paws Claws Scales & Tales,
released January 1, 2006
license
all rights reserved
tags
about
Monty Harper Stillwater, Oklahoma
Monty Harper is a children's musician in Stillwater, OK. He performs for elementary schools and libraries, helps kids write their own songs in workshops and residencies, does informal science education, and writes songs for clients.
discography
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Apr 2015 -
Mar 2014 -
Nov 2013 -
Nov 2011
contact / help
Monty Harper recommends:
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The Rap Guide to Evolution Revised
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